3 Month Old Milestones Checklist – Exactly How I Applied Positive Parenting to Finally Get My Kids to Behave

3 Month Old Milestones Checklist
HAZEL DEAN
Wife to Antonio, and mommy of two girls

When I initially came to be a mom, I knew that I intended to do things differently than how I was brought up. My mom and dad did the very best they could, however they didn’t have access to the myriad of positive parenting tools offered today. 3 Month Old Milestones Checklist

There were a few books on our shelf about handling power struggles, just how to deal with the strong-willed child, and also just how to get your kids to do what you say. I remember seeing these books around the house, and I distinctly remember thinking at the time, “My own parents don’t understand me.”

I’m uncertain what exactly they found out in those books, but I experienced a great deal of spanking, a great deal of screaming, and also a great deal of just plain losing control.

It was a challenging number of years. And our relationship is still not the best today, although I have truly forgiven them for their mistakes. I have actually begun to realize that, while no person is perfect, it is our obligation to be the very best parent we can possibly be for our children. I understood I wanted to stop the cycle when I became a mom.3 Month Old Milestones Checklist

From toddlers to teens, positive parenting is my answer 3 Month Old Milestones Checklist

My very own experience with positive parenting started when my oldest child was born. I started reading blog posts regarding just how a child’s secure attachment to a parent is damaged with spanking, screaming, extreme punishments and also practically every other commonly accepted parenting technique.

I started to assume, “Well, if you can not do those things, just how in the world do you get obtain your kids to behave?” Little did I know there’s an entire tool kit of positive parenting tips that allow every person to get their needs met. I learned more about:

• Problem-solving

• Managing power struggles

• Strong communication skills

• Natural consequences

• Just how every one of these ideas lead to healthy and balanced child development 3 Month Old Milestones Checklist

3 Month Old Milestones Checklist

In the process, my husband Antonio joined my journey. He brought a different viewpoint. He had 2 teenage boys from a previous relationship, and also had actually witnessed firsthand just how being the “mean dad” may seem to benefit for the moment. However long-term, it was just promoting disrespect, contempt as well as bitterness in what was expected to be a caring parent-child relationship.

Considering his history as well as finding out precisely what NOT to do, Antonio was equally as open as I was to examining and also applying positive parenting in our lives.

So what does positive parenting really mean anyhow? 3 Month Old Milestones Checklist

Initially, let me tell you what it does not imply. Positive parenting is NOT:

• Letting your kids do whatever they want

• Being a passive parent

• Overlooking significant misbehavior

• Providing your children everything they want 3 Month Old Milestones Checklist

• Being a servant on-call 24/7

• Shielding your kids from what will certainly be expected of them in “the real world”

• Having no restrictions

You might hear positive parenting called by other names like peaceful parenting, gentle parenting, respectful parenting or connection parenting. No matter what you call it, this parenting technique recognizes the reality that cooperation consistently produces better long-lasting results than strict control.

Moms and dads that embrace this concept have actually figured out how to cultivate:

• Shared respect

• Empathy (both in themselves as well as in their children)

• Establishing healthy and balanced boundaries

• Developing a child’s foundational character traits

Helping children to do what’s right since they WANT to, not due to the fact that they fear punishment if they don’t … After all, what takes place once they’re adults and also the threat of punishment is removed?

• Acknowledgment that both children as well as parents need to be heard and valued

• Encouraging kids to grow their self-restraint

• Going much deeper than mere outside conformity and also concentrating on the child’s heart

The amusing thing is, when you really dig in to the heart issues, all the surface-level “obedience” stuff resolves itself.

What are some positive parenting techniques? And how do you correct a child’s bad behavior with positive parenting?

When I first began down the road of gentle parenting, I couldn’t picture that there were various other means to “get a child to behave” besides punishing as well as shouting. That’s how I was parented, and therefore I just had no framework for anything different. 3 Month Old Milestones Checklist

I’ll share some parenting strategies I picked up from Amy McCready, a nationally recognized parenting expert and also owner of Positive Parenting Solutions. Amy has actually acted as parenting guide to 75,000+ mothers and fathers, helping them remove the power struggle of reactionary parenting via her 7-Step Parenting Success System on-line program.

Right here are a couple of the methods Amy shares to encourage you to become the mama or daddy you’ve always intended to be, as well as assist your child to reach his or her complete potential.

Identify the root of the behavior

I told you this is deep stuff. It’s often much easier (and also more common in today’s society) to think children are just spoiled-rotten brats, which is why they act out.

We can progress a whole lot farther toward fixing power struggles when we see children as little people. They have needs similar to you and me. And frequently their legitimate needs are magnified based on where they’re currently at on the brain as well as language development spectrum. 3 Month Old Milestones Checklist

For example, a young child’s pre-frontal cortex (the part of the brain that enables self-control) is not yet matured. That indicates they can go from happy one minute to complete tantrum the next. So as opposed to dealing with a losing fight by ordering a 2-year-old to time-out for hitting you on the arm, you can recognize that:

• Toddlers have little self-restraint to begin with

• Anger is a secondary feeling – that implies there is always a primary emotion beneath it

• A lot of angry children are in fact anxious and/or very sad

What’s a peaceful parent to do?

• Determine if there are any kind of fundamental needs that should be addressed initially. For instance, if a child is starving or tired, there’s no amount of peaceful OR punitive parenting that is going to remedy the problem. Concentrate on meeting that large need initially.

• Empathize with his emotions without approving of the actions (“I can see that you’re truly angry due to the fact that I said we could not play at the park today. I recognize it’s difficult due to the fact that you really wish to play on the swings. Hitting hurts, and I will not let you do it”) … After that, move away to protect yourself if needed.

• Focusing way too much on what you DON’T desire the child to do only makes the scenario even worse. So redirect the behavior toward something he CAN do to let off steam when he is furious – like surround himself in a huge hug and say loudly “I’m mad!” Or tighten his hands into clenched fists and growl. The goal is to permit him to express his anger in an age-appropriate way, while not hurting any individual or anything.

Keep In Mind the Golden Rule

I told you earlier that positive parenting works for every age – from young children to ‘tweens, teenagers as well as everything in between. So let’s think about teenagers in our following example … 3 Month Old Milestones Checklist

Respectful parenting goes both ways. That suggests what we want to receive from our child, we should be prepared to offer. If I am disrespectful, controlling and also sarcastic to my young adult merely due to the fact that I “have every right given that I am the parent” or due to the fact that “my child started it,” what do you assume that teaches my child?

It is a lot easier to give respect to someone when they are respecting and appreciating you. As the mom or daddy, you can set the standard as well as communicate to your teenager that you value their viewpoint, as well as you appreciate them as a person. 3 Month Old Milestones Checklist

This doesn’t indicate you have to be a pushover. Yet it does imply you can be kind despite conflict. It will certainly accomplish more than you realize to establish the stage for problem solving with each other toward a resolution.

In a comparable way, children grow a million times more from what we do than from what we say. So, if we desire our teenager to treat us with even more regard, the first step is to make sure that you, as the parent, are doing simply that to everyone in your life. 3 Month Old Milestones Checklist

Are you kind to your spouse, to your siblings, to all your children, as well as to the customer support rep on the phone? In each of those circumstances, you have a VIP audience of one (your child!) that you must be considering. Keep in mind, the apple will not fall far from the tree.

Is positive parenting really effective?

I could answer this question with an unquestionable “Yes!” Or I could share an individual recollection …

Just the other day, my 2 daughters were having a squabble. I asked my 3-year-old exactly how she really felt, and she claimed she was angry due to the fact that my 6-year-old took a sticker label she was playing with.

My 6-year-old heard this, went into the other room to collect her thoughts, then came back and also returned the swiped sticker label, said sorry and also requested forgiveness.

They made up, hugged and also started playing again happily. Yes, this ACTUALLY HAPPENED. No, I did not force or intimidate anyone to resolve the dispute. And also yet we experienced a stunning resolution. You know why? 3 Month Old Milestones Checklist

Due to the fact that we have modeled for our children exactly how to problem solve, exactly how to deal with conflict, and also even how to ask forgiveness. That’s right – we say sorry to our kids when we mess up. (Gasp! Ask forgiveness to children, oh the horror.) That investment is returned a thousand-fold when you realize your children will inevitably repeat your actions.

The bottom line is … When we can humble ourselves, deal with everyone around us with respect, as well as model the habits we want, you would certainly be amazed at what’s possible.

Some readers may be wondering about my hubby, Antonio, and also his two teenage boys from a previous marriage. In time, Antonio has actually started parenting positively also, and also the restoration of their connection is nothing except a miracle.

Just how can you become a positive parent? 3 Month Old Milestones Checklist

This is the million-dollar question! Knowing positive parenting is one of the most satisfying things I’ve ever done. I will not lie to you – it can be challenging to transform your old way of life. Little by little, you will make improvements. And also a year or more from now, you will not think how much you’ve changed, in addition to the closer connection you have with your kids.

I recommend any person that is serious about coming to be a more positive mommy or daddy to take a look at Amy McCready’s Positive Parenting Solutions FREE parenting webinar. 3 Month Old Milestones Checklist

You have actually probably seen Amy on ABC, CBS, CNN, FOX, MSNBC, Today Show, Rachel Ray or any kind of variety of media networks. Her products have been life-changing for more than 75,000 parents across the globe, as well as there’s no much better parenting guidance you can truly use every day.

In her cost-free webinar, Amy shares just how to help kids of all ages to behave WITHOUT manipulating or shouting. She’ll assist you in starting parenting positive, and also learn how to quit the power struggle before it begins! You can register for the free webinar by clicking the button shown below. 3 Month Old Milestones Checklist


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