Baby Refuses To Drink Milk – Exactly How I Applied Positive Parenting to Finally Get My Kids to Cooperate

Baby Refuses To Drink Milk
HAZEL DEAN
Wife to Antonio, and mommy of two girls

When I first became a mommy, I recognized that I wished to do things differently than how I was brought up. My mom and dad did the best they could, however they really did not have access to the myriad of positive parenting tools offered today. Baby Refuses To Drink Milk

There were a couple of books on our shelf regarding handling power struggles, exactly how to discipline the strong-willed child, as well as just how to get your kids to obey. I remember seeing these books around our home, and I clearly recall thinking at the time, “My mom and dad do not understand me.”

I’m uncertain exactly what they found out in those books, yet I grew up with a lot of spanking, a lot of shouting, and a great deal of just plain tempers raging.

It was a hard number of years. And also our connection is still strained today, although I’ve truly forgiven them for what happened. I have actually begun to understand that, while nobody is without fault, it is our responsibility to be the most effective parent we can possibly be for our children. I knew I wanted to stop the cycle when I became a mama.Baby Refuses To Drink Milk

From toddlers to teenagers, positive parenting is my plan Baby Refuses To Drink Milk

My very own experience with positive parenting began when my first little girl was born. I began reviewing articles about how a child’s secure attachment to a parent is damaged through spanking, yelling, harsh punishments as well as virtually every other generally approved parenting technique.

I started to think, “Well, if you can’t do those things, just how in the world do you get obtain your kids to do what you ask?” Little did I realize there’s a whole toolbox of positive parenting tips that enable every person to get their needs met. I found out about:

• Problem-solving

• Managing power struggles

• Solid communication skills

• Natural consequences

• Exactly how all of these concepts cause healthy child development Baby Refuses To Drink Milk

Baby Refuses To Drink Milk

Along the way, my hubby Antonio joined my journey. He brought a different viewpoint. He had two teenage boys from a previous marriage, and had observed firsthand just how being the “mean dad” could seem to help temporarily. Long-term, it was just fostering disrespect, contempt and also resentment in what was intended to be a caring parent-child connection.

Considering his background and also discovering specifically what NOT to do, Antonio was equally as open as I was to researching and also following through with positive parenting in our lives.

What does positive parenting mean anyhow? Baby Refuses To Drink Milk

Let me inform you what it doesn’t imply. Positive parenting is NOT:

• Allowing your kids to run wild

• Being a lazy parent

• Overlooking significant misbehavior

• Giving your children every little thing they want Baby Refuses To Drink Milk

• Being a servant on-call 24/7

• Sheltering your kids from what will be required of them in “real life”

• Having no limitations

You may see positive parenting called by other names like peaceful parenting, gentle parenting, respectful parenting or connection parenting. No matter what you call it, this parenting method identifies the fact that collaboration always produces far better long-lasting results than forced control.

Parents that embrace this design have actually learned to foster:

• Shared respect

• Empathy (both in themselves and in their children)

• Establishing healthy boundaries

• Building a child’s fundamental character and morals

Encouraging children to do what’s right due to the fact that they WANT to, not since they are afraid of retribution if they don’t … After all, what takes place once they’re grownups and the threat of punishment is removed?

• Acknowledgment that both children and parents need to be heard and also valued

• Assisting kids to grow their self-discipline

• Going much deeper than mere outward conformity and also focusing on the child’s heart

The funny thing is, when you actually dig in to the heart issues, all the surface-level “obedience” stuff resolves itself.

What are some positive parenting techniques? And how do you correct a child’s bad behavior with positive parenting?

When I first began down the road of gentle parenting, I could not imagine that there were various other methods to “get a child to behave” besides harsh punishments as well as yelling. That’s exactly how I was parented, and I obviously had no understanding about anything different. Baby Refuses To Drink Milk

I’ll share some parenting strategies I learned from Amy McCready, a well-known parenting expert as well as founder of Positive Parenting Solutions. Amy has functioned as parenting guide to thousands of mothers and fathers, helping them eliminate the power struggle of reactionary parenting via her 7-Step Parenting Success System online course.

Right here are a number of the methods Amy teaches to encourage you to become the mom or dad you have actually always wanted to be, and assist your child to reach his/her complete potential.

Identify the root of the misbehavior

I mentioned this is deep. It’s often easier (as well as more typical in today’s society) to think children are just spoiled-rotten brats, which is why they act out.

We can progress a whole lot further toward fixing power struggles when we see children as little human beings. They have needs similar to you and me. And also often times their legitimate needs are multiplied based on where they’re at on the brain and also language development spectrum. Baby Refuses To Drink Milk

A toddler’s pre-frontal cortex (the part of the brain that allows self-discipline) is not yet formed. That suggests they can go from cloud nine one minute to major meltdown the next. Instead of combating a losing battle by sending a 2-year-old to time-out for slapping you on the arm, you can acknowledge that:

• Young children have little self-control to begin with

• Anger is a secondary feeling – that indicates there is always a key feeling below it

• Most mad children are really scared and/or sad

What’s a peaceful parent to do?

• Determine if there are any fundamental needs that must be addressed first. For instance, if a child is hungry or worn out, there’s no amount of peaceful OR punitive parenting that is likely to assist. Concentrate on meeting that huge need first.

• Acknowledge his emotions without accepting the actions (“I can see that you’re sincerely angry due to the fact that I said we could not play at the park today. I recognize it’s tough since you truly want to play on the swings. But, hitting hurts, so I will not let you do it”) … Then, move away to protect yourself if required.

• Concentrating too much on what you DON’T desire the child to do just makes the scenario even worse. So redirect the behavior towards something he CAN do to let off steam when he’s mad – like squeeze himself in a large hug and say loudly “I am angry!” Or tighten his hands right into clenched fists and also growl. The intent is to enable him to express his anger in an age-appropriate way, while not hurting any individual or anything.

Remember the Golden Rule

I told you previously that positive parenting benefits all ages – from young children to ‘tweens, teenagers and also everyone in between. So let’s talk about young adults in our next example … Baby Refuses To Drink Milk

Respectful parenting goes both ways. That implies what we intend to obtain from our child, we have to agree to give first. If I am impolite, manipulative and sarcastic to my teen simply since I “have every right given that I am the parent” or due to the fact that “my child started it,” what do you think that teaches my child?

It is a lot easier to offer respect to somebody when they are respecting and valuing you. As the mother or dad, you can set the example as well as communicate to your teen that you value their point of view, and also you respect them as a person. Baby Refuses To Drink Milk

This doesn’t indicate you have to be a pushover. However it does suggest you can be kind in the face of disputes. It will certainly accomplish a lot more than you anticipate to establish the stage for problem solving together towards a resolution.

In a similar way, children mature a million times more from what we do than from what we say. If we want our teenager to treat us with even more respect, the initial step is to make certain you, as the parent, are doing just that to every person in your life. Baby Refuses To Drink Milk

Are you gentle to your partner, to your siblings, to all your children, as well as to the customer support rep on the phone? In every one of those scenarios, you have a VIP audience of one (your child!) that you need to be considering. Remember, the apple will not fall far from the tree.

Is positive parenting really effective?

I could address this one with an unquestionable “Yes!” Or I can share an individual recollection …

Just a few days ago, my two young girls were having a spat. I asked my 3-year-old just how she felt, and also she claimed she was angry due to the fact that my 6-year-old took a sticker label she was playing with.

My 6-year-old heard this, went into the other room to collect her thoughts, then came back and returned the stolen sticker, apologized as well as asked for forgiveness.

They made up, embraced as well as started playing once more happily. Yes, this ACTUALLY HAPPENED. No, I did not control or threaten any individual to fix the dispute. As well as yet we experienced a lovely resolution. You know why? Baby Refuses To Drink Milk

Because we have actually modeled for our children how to problem solve, exactly how to settle conflict, and even how to say sorry. That’s right – we say sorry to our kids when we make a mistake. (Gasp! Say sorry to children, oh the horror.) That investment is returned a thousand-fold when you recognize your children will unavoidably repeat your actions.

The bottom line is … When we can humble ourselves, treat everyone around us with respect, and model the habits we want, you would certainly be amazed at what’s possible.

Some visitors might be wondering about my spouse, Antonio, as well as his 2 teenage sons from a previous marriage. Gradually, Antonio has started parenting positively as well, and also the repair of their relationship is nothing short of miraculous.

How can you become a positive parent? Baby Refuses To Drink Milk

This is the million-dollar question! Learning positive parenting is one of the most satisfying things I’ve ever before done. I will not lie to you – it can be hard to alter your old parenting style. Little by little, you will make improvements. And a year or more from now, you will not believe just how much you have actually transformed, along with the closer connection you have with your kids.

I advise any individual who is serious about coming to be a much more positive mom or daddy to take a look at Amy McCready’s Positive Parenting Solutions FREE parenting webinar. Baby Refuses To Drink Milk

You have actually possibly seen Amy on ABC, CBS, CNN, FOX, MSNBC, Today Show, Rachel Ray or any kind of variety of media networks. Her products have actually been life-altering for greater than 75,000 moms and dads around the world, and there’s no much better parenting guidance you can absolutely apply every day.

In her free class, Amy shares exactly how to get kids of every age to listen WITHOUT nagging or yelling. She’ll aid you in beginning parenting positive, and find out how to stop the power struggle before it begins! You can sign up for the free class by clicking the button below. Baby Refuses To Drink Milk


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