When I first became a mama, I recognized that I wanted to do things differently than how I was brought up. My mom and dad did the best they could, but they really did not have access to the myriad of positive parenting tools offered today. Educational Activities For 2 Year Olds
There were a few books on our shelf about taking care of power struggles, exactly how to deal with the stubborn child, and also just how to get your kids to obey. I remember seeing these books around our home, and I distinctly remember thinking at the time, “My mom and dad don’t understand me.”
I’m not sure just what they learned in those books, however I experienced a great deal of spanking, a great deal of yelling, and also a great deal of just plain losing control.
It was a hard number of years. And also our connection is still strained today, although I’ve genuinely forgiven them for their mistakes. I’ve begun to understand that, while no one is perfect, it is our duty to be the most effective parent we can possibly be for our children. I understood I wanted to stop the cycle when I came to be a mom.Educational Activities For 2 Year Olds
From toddlers to teenagers, positive parenting is my approach Educational Activities For 2 Year Olds
My own experience with positive parenting began when my first little girl was born. I began reviewing blog posts regarding how a child’s secure attachment to a parent is harmed with spanking, screaming, harsh punishments and also practically every other traditionally approved parenting method.
I began to believe, “Well, if you can not do those things, exactly how in the world do you get obtain your kids to pay attention to you?” Little did I realize there’s a whole toolbox of positive parenting tips that enable every person to have their needs fulfilled. I found out about:
• Solving power struggles
• Strong communication skills
• Natural consequences
• Exactly how every one of these concepts cause healthy child development Educational Activities For 2 Year Olds
In the process, my other half Antonio joined my journey. But he brought his own unique viewpoint. He had two teenage boys from a previous marriage, and also had seen firsthand just how being the “mean father” might appear to benefit for the moment. But in the long run, it was only promoting disrespect, anger and bitterness in what was meant to be a loving parent-child connection.
Considering his history as well as finding out specifically what NOT to do, Antonio was equally as open as I was to studying as well as implementing positive parenting in our lives.
What does positive parenting mean anyhow? Educational Activities For 2 Year Olds
Initially, let me inform you what it doesn’t indicate. Positive parenting is NOT:
• Letting your kids run wild
• Being a lazy parent
• Disregarding major wrongdoing
• Providing your children whatever they want Educational Activities For 2 Year Olds
• Being a servant on-call 24/7
• Shielding your kids from what will certainly be expected of them in “the real world”
• Having no boundaries
You might see positive parenting called by other names like peaceful parenting, gentle parenting, respectful parenting or connection parenting. No matter what you call it, this parenting technique acknowledges the fact that cooperation always yields much better lasting results than forced control.
Parents who embrace this concept have figured out how to cultivate:
• Mutual respect
• Empathy (both in themselves as well as in their children)
• Establishing healthy boundaries
• Building a child’s foundational character traits
• Encouraging children to do what’s right because they WANT to, not since they are afraid of punishment if they do not … Nevertheless, what happens when they’re adults and also the threat of punishment is over?
• Recommendation that both children as well as parents need to be listened to and also valued
• Encouraging kids to develop self-restraint
• Going much deeper than simple exterior conformity as well as concentrating on the child’s heart
The funny thing is, when you truly dig in to the heart issues, all the surface-level “obedience” stuff resolves itself.
What are some positive parenting techniques? And how do you correct a child’s bad behavior with positive parenting?
When I initially started down the path of gentle parenting, I could not believe that there were various other methods to “get a child to behave” besides punishing and yelling. That’s just how I was parented, and therefore I obviously had no understanding about anything different. Educational Activities For 2 Year Olds
I’ll share some parenting strategies I picked up from Amy McCready, a nationally recognized parenting expert and founder of Positive Parenting Solutions. Amy has actually functioned as parenting guide to countless moms and dads, helping them eliminate the power struggle of reactionary parenting with her 7-Step Parenting Success System online course.
Get to the root of the misbehavior
I told you this is deep stuff. It’s usually widely accepted (and also more typical in today’s society) to assume children are just spoiled-rotten brats, which is why they act out.
But we can get a great deal more towards addressing power struggles when we see children as little humans. They real needs similar to you and me. As well as often times their legitimate needs are amplified based on where they’re at on the brain and also language development spectrum. Educational Activities For 2 Year Olds
For instance, a 2-year-old’s pre-frontal cortex (the part of the brain that enables self-control) is not yet formed. That means they can go from joyful one minute to major meltdown the next. Rather than battling a losing fight by ordering a 2-year-old to time-out for slapping you on the arm, you can recognize that:
• Toddlers have little self-restraint to begin with
• Anger is a secondary feeling – that means there is typically a primary feeling under it
• The majority of upset children are actually scared and/or sad
So what’s a peaceful parent to do?
• Determine if there are any fundamental needs that have to be addressed first. As an example, if a child is hungry or sleepy, there’s no amount of peaceful OR punitive parenting that is going to assist. Concentrate on addressing that large need first.
• Validate his emotions without accepting the actions (“I can see that you’re really upset since I said we could not play at the park today. I recognize it’s hard since you truly wish to play on the swings. But, hitting hurts, and also I won’t allow you to do it”) … Then, move away to protect yourself if necessary.
• Focusing way too much on what you DON’T want the child to do only makes the circumstance worse. So redirect the behavior toward something he MAY DO to let off steam when he’s mad – like surround himself in a huge hug and also say firmly “I am angry!” Or tighten his hands into fists and also growl. The goal is to enable him to express his disappointment in an age-appropriate way, while not hurting anybody or anything.
Remember the Golden Rule
I told you earlier that positive parenting works for every age – from young children to ‘tweens, teenagers and also everything in between. So let’s talk about young adults in our next example … Educational Activities For 2 Year Olds
Respectful parenting goes both ways. That implies what we desire to obtain from our child, we must be willing to provide. If I am discourteous, manipulative as well as sarcastic to my young adult just because I “have every right given that I am the parent” or due to the fact that “my kid started it,” what do you think that communicates to my child?
It is a lot easier to provide respect to someone when they are respecting and valuing you. As the mom or father, you can set the example as well as show your young adult that you value their point of view, and you value them as a person. Educational Activities For 2 Year Olds
This does not imply you need to be a pushover. Yet it does indicate you can be kind despite conflict. It will certainly accomplish more than you realize to establish the stage for problem solving with each other toward a resolution.
In a comparable way, children mature a million times more from what we do than from what we claim to believe. So, if we desire our teen to treat us with more regard, the primary step is to make sure that you, as the parent, are doing simply that to every person in your life. Educational Activities For 2 Year Olds
Are you gentle to your partner, to your brother or sisters, to all your children, and also to the customer service rep on the phone? In every one of those circumstances, you have a VIP audience of one (your child!) that you must be thinking about. Keep in mind, the apple will not fall far from the tree.
Is positive parenting really effective?
I can address this one with a resounding “Yes!” Or I could share a personal recollection …
Just recently, my 2 daughters were having a tiff. I asked my 3-year-old exactly how she really felt, and also she claimed she was angry because my 6-year-old took a sticker she was playing with.
My 6-year-old heard this, escaped to the other room to collect her thoughts, after that came back and returned the swiped sticker, apologized and also requested forgiveness.
They made up, embraced and started playing once more gladly. Yes, this ACTUALLY HAPPENED. No, I did not require or manipulate any individual to resolve the dispute. As well as yet we experienced a lovely resolution. You know why? Educational Activities For 2 Year Olds
Due to the fact that we have modeled for our children how to problem solve, how to fix conflict, and also even how to apologize. That’s right – we ask forgiveness to our kids when we make a mistake. (Gasp! Say sorry to children, oh the horror.) That investment is returned a thousand-fold when you realize your children will unavoidably repeat your actions.
The bottom line is … When we can swallow our pride, deal with every person around us with respect, and model the actions we want, you would be astonished at what’s possible.
Some readers may be wondering about my partner, Antonio, and his two adolescent sons from a previous relationship. With time, Antonio has actually begun parenting positively too, as well as the restoration of their relationship is nothing except a miracle.
How can you come to be a positive parent? Educational Activities For 2 Year Olds
This is the million-dollar question! Knowing positive parenting is one of the most fulfilling things I’ve ever before done. I won’t lie to you – it can be tough to alter your old ways. However little by little, you will make improvements. And a year or 2 from now, you will not believe just how much you’ve changed, together with the closer relationship you have with your kids.
I recommend anybody who is serious about coming to be a more positive mother or father to take a look at Amy McCready’s Positive Parenting Solutions FREE parenting webinar. Educational Activities For 2 Year Olds
You’ve probably seen Amy on ABC, CBS, CNN, FOX, MSNBC, Today Show, Rachel Ray or any type of number of media networks. Her products have actually been life-changing for greater than 75,000 moms and dads across the globe, and there’s no much better parenting guidance you can genuinely apply every day.
In her free webinar, Amy shares exactly how to help kids of every age to listen WITHOUT nagging or shouting. She’ll assist you in starting parenting positive, as well as discover how to quit the power struggle before it begins! You can register for the totally free webinar by clicking the button shown below. Educational Activities For 2 Year Olds
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